The Perfect Machine Starts to Have Engine Trouble

The Perfect Machine Starts to Have Engine Trouble

Here you are….driving along through life just fine….here you are in life….your path is a hilly road….ups and downs.  That’s life.  You roll with the punches and maximize the good times.  You never think much about aging.

So, imagine yourself, driving in that car through life….cruising on a road….and then you turn 50.  The road becomes bumpy.  Not hilly…bumpy.  Yes, it’s inevitable.  Things change.  Me? I’m in perfect health. Never had a broken or any illness of any kind other than simple colds.  I’m blessed (see my story “The Theory of Neglect”).    But, nature does not intend for us to live forever.  The planet cannot keep so many people for so long.  It is the natural progression of things.

Nevertheless, that does not mean we have to like it!

I never wore glasses of any kind until I was 52.  That is when the “car I was cruising in down the road of life came to end of the road and fell off a cliff, Thelma and Louise style”….I needed mild readers.  Now, I’m 57.  I need the damn maximum size readers for freaking everything.

My husband lost his hearing in one ear.  He has severe ADD.  He put a Q-Tip in his ear after showering; left it there and grabbed a towel to dry his hair; and plunged the darn Q-tip absentmindedly into his ear.  OUCH!!!!!! He punctured his eardrum completely.  Yes, everything you’re grandmother told you about being careful with your ears is true.  He had two surgeries to patch the hole and both times the patch fell out.  So, we must listen to the television very loud.  This has been going on for over 10 years.  I get the circumstances. NOW, I cannot hear the television unless the damn this is loud too.  Dammit.  My hearing is 100% fine but when I listen to the television; I need to put it up loud.

I have many stairs in my house.  Sometimes when I’m climbing the stairs…up or down…if I’m carrying something like a laundry basket….I get vertigo and can’t tell which step I’m on and get dizzy.  This has never, ever happened to me, and I’m disconcerted by it.  I dislike it completely and I fight it.

I’m fortunate in that, for the most part, everything else is still hanging in….the “engine”….the incredible machine/body that God created works perfectly.

But I am completely aware that more and more little insidious things, abilities will fade.  I accept it but I don’t like it.  I’m very self-sufficient and independent.

I shall not go gently into that goodnight.

But when it is time to say goodnight; I shall go peacefully.

Younger and older woman with hourglass

Younger and older woman with hourglass


2 Comment

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